How to Handle Those Who Hurt You

“To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit; not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.” 1 Peter 3:8-9

Dr. David Seamands, author, seminary professor, and former pastor, reveals the pivotal role of receiving and extending forgiveness in handling our hurts. Seamands writes in his book Healing For Damaged Emotions:
       
“When we fail to receive God’s grace and forgiveness, we also fail to give unconditional love, forgiveness, and grace to other people. And this results in a breakdown of our interpersonal relationships. It results in emotional conflicts between us and other people. The unforgiven are the unforgiving, and the unforgiving complete the vicious circle because they cannot be forgiven.

“...Think of how you apply this to the significant others in your life: parents who hurt you when you were growing up; brothers and sisters who failed you when you needed help...; a friend who betrayed you; a sweetheart who rejected you; your marriage partner, who promised to love, honor, comfort, and care for you, but instead has nagged or caused you pain.

“...Because He has set us free, we can set others free and thereby set in motion grace and love. The apostle Paul summed it up in nine words: ‘Owe nothing to anyone except to love one another...’ (Rom. 13:8).”

“...‘Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him?...’” Matthew 18:21